BadDogs Chronicles Submissions [1997] -- Ruth Steinback
I recently went digging through the power of the internet and dug up two shorts I wrote a very long time ago for the site "Bad Dog Chronicles". All the stories there were/are written from the dogs' perspectives as they find themselves in various stages of misbehaviour and odd circumstances.

Both shorts are true accounts of the kind of mischief Sasha has been known to get up to. I actually won an award of recognition on the site for the "Whats that doggone smell?" story. A small thing I know but it was pretty neat for a twelve year old who'd just got the internet! According to the records on the site Sasha was four, which means we'd only had her for a year. And yes, I groan at the quality of my very old writing, but its too neat a find not to archive. ^_~;; Especially considering that BadDogs was about one of the first three websites I ever habituated when I was introduced to the internet (alongside and something else I can't remember)!

What is That Doggone Smell?

Hi this is Sasha. I just got myself into a slightly smelly situation. My family and I were visiting some friends yesterday and we went for a long walk. We saw lots of birds and squirrels and chipmunks. Then we all went back to the house and they went inside. I didn't because one of our friends was allergic to me. After they went in I inspected the table they had tied me to keep me from chasing squirrels. Then I settled down on the deck for a nap.

Awhile later I woke up to the sound of another animal prowling around. It looked like a strange black cat with a white stripe down it's back. I later found out that it was a skunk. I wasn't about to let any old skunk wander around my friends' place so I gave chase. Usually I give chase silently but this time I couldn't because that stupid table I was dragging behind me kept crashing and banging. I'm guessing it gave me away. The skunk did it's specialty and sent a stink bomb my way. I suppose his aim wasn't very good because he hit the edge of the table and I didn't get the full blast. After that my dad came out to see what all the noise was about and after he found me (I had wandered a little ways into the woods during my chase) he tied me up infront of the house so I wouldn't get sprayed again. Then Ruth thought she smelled skunk so she and the other kids came upstairs to find out what happened. My mom and dad told them the whole story and for the rest of the night they told alot of jokes about me and the skunk.

I've learned my lesson but I still smell like that doggone skunk. A word of warning to you other dogs. Stay clear of any that looks like a strange black cat. It's probably a skunk and you'll pay if you chase it. Does any dog out there know how to get rid of the smell??

How Was I Supposed to Know?

It was almost a year ago on my dad's birthday. My family had given him presents and eaten a really yummy looking cake. After that we all went to bed.

The next morning they let me in and went back to sleep I guess. Anyway, they had put the leftover cake on the counter the night before covered in some clear wrapping. It was still there in the morning and boy was it tempting. I just stood up with my paws on the counter and carfully picked out all the yucky candles before I dug in. How was I supposed to know it wasn't left there for me?

When my family got up a while later for breakfast, they were dissapointed but I didn't get in trouble. They said it was because they didn't catch me red-handed or in my case, red-pawed.